Saturday, May 31, 2008
HI GUYS IM BACK FROM HC CAMP!
i just wanted to say that i enjoyed the camp ALOT. seriously. despite the disgustingly smelling toilet where we had to bathe and all the punishments we had to do. i really liked the whole camp a lot. it has really brought the whole 9th House Council SO TIGHTLY KNITTED together. everyone got to know one another better and it was really a good experience. i love the SEA EXPEDITION like MADNESS! i was in a kayak, whoots! its like you're in this small kayak with a partner, [EMI!] and you can see the blue blue sky and feel the sun shining down on you, the wind caressing your face and the tides cradling you and your partner. i love it so much. its something i would totally want to do forever. land expedition was funfunfun too! we get to roll in mud! ad it was really cool. only downside is that we dirtied our highlighter shirt the first time we wore it. damnnn. ahhaa. i think im going to scream if i cant get the dirt out. T.T field cooking, GREAT, kudos to the cooks, the food was really GOOD, the best outdoor food cooked that i've tasted! <3 ahahaha the rest of us were carrying back the kayaks etc. forgot to say that there was this huge group of army guys[commanders/do-s too] on the beach when we came back and we were all asking debbie to choose one husband amongst them. AHAHAHA. then there was this really nice commander who decided to help us carry the kayaks! so nice can! we probably look like we were going to die under the weight of the kayaks. :x and we were too tired after kayaking/ paddling [for the rafters] for around 9km +++ HAAH.
by the way, the teachers, mr jerry chua, mr ben soh, mr jonathan yoong, ms tay, ms su, are all really nice and cool. especially mr jerry chua and mr ben soh! they're really spontaneous! and we named our new team member, [a watermelon. :x] BJ! i hope you guys see the link. :x oh yes. and we pushed mr chua into the milo[aka mud and dirty dunnowhatelse] pool! AHHAHA. :x he's our daddy, and we're his kids. loved his analogy.
i slept in the same a hut as debbie, deborah and candice. they're really funny luh! ahahahaa. (: I LOVE ROMANISSSSS! <3
i forgot to talk about high elements, specifically, the challenge pole. it was DAMN EXHILARATING! hahahaha so many people were staring luh, not just trainers teachers and hc peeps, but also others from YJ [i think] AHHAA. but i love the view up there! (: night walk was okay, but no torchlight no moonlight, so i was pretty blind the whole time. T.T
anyway, i'm STARING at my RED RED RED SKIN. AHAHA. i've got really cool [BAD TOO] SUNBURNS on my arms and legs and face~ from the sea expedition. LOL. i only put sunblock of SPF 135[O.O from emi!] on my face and still kena~ LOL. it's okay! i like. dunno why also. but recently i've been having this sudden urge of wanting to get sunburn and peel my skin. so my wish is granted! YAYE. bad thing is that i didnt manage to even out my tan line on my arms. its damn ugly. oh well whatever, HAHA. my burns are all hurting together with the abrasions and bruises and muscle aches. GREAT. hahahahha. im super tired. but im just really satisfied, cause i washed everything from the camp already! and i bathed too! omg such satisfaction from a bath. (((: im supposed to sleep. but its okay i wanna like blog finish this. :x
last words; NINTH HOUSE COUNCIL ROCKS! AND I LOVE ALL OF YOU GUYS!
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
hey guys!
i'll be going off for my camp from tomorrow 29 may all the way to 31 may! soo, dont miss me guys! (:
AND AHAHAH. sorry collin, cannot accompany you through these 3 days, LOVESICK
KID COLLIN! HEH. (:
see you guys. (: on the 31. i'm damn tired.
Monday, May 26, 2008
i dont know how to put this across properly. but. it feels like, because of which position you stand at, people avoid you and don't talk to you. they feel that you're putting on airs no matter how much you've tried to blend in to them; they just feel you dont belong. it really sucks to feel that way. i dont think anyone would understand how i feel.
no one does.
i miss people who truly understands me.
thank god i have my mum with me, i love her to bits.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
ahahha i've recently been extremely addicted to this song, 'only love' by trademark. it looks seemingly happy/optimistic, but sounds really sad to me. T.T oh well. heh. nothing much to say, except that this holiday is going to be a mad rush for me, and i'm going to be so tired and everything. -.- i'm definitely not going to have a extremely good rest. but what to do, sacrificial time for STUDIES/GRADES and HC. soo, NO PROCRASTINATION. and shit, i havent done anything but read newspapers and the many many many time magazines that were left unread. :x damn.
Only Love- Trademark2am and the rain is falling
Here we are at the crossroads once again
You're telling me you're so confused
You can't make up your mind
Is this meant to be
You're asking me
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
In your arms as the dawn is breaking
Face to face and a thousand miles apart
I've tried my best to make you see
There's hope beyond the pain
If we give enough
If we learn to trust
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
I know if I could find the words
To touch you deep inside
You'll give my dreams just one more chance
To let this be our last goodbye
But only love can stay
Try again or walk away
But i believe for you and me
The sun will shine one day
So i just play my part
Pray you'll have a change of heart
But i can make you see it through
That's something only love can do
That's something only love can do
I'm really disappointed. why did you have to do this to me. i've been thinking about you. i have so much to say, but forget it. blogging about this is so not private luh. you've just stabbed me right into my heart. thanks a lot. you're unbelievable. *rolls eyes*
Monday, May 12, 2008
i'm quite happy. cause i kinda got my urge back. and i love the feeling. must be because of the amount of homework i had to chiong during the weekend. i mean like, there isn't ALOT of homework, but it's how hard the homework is. -.- yeh. the homework was hard. especially the econs assignment. damnit. i feel like shit after doing it. but the urge is greater now. and i feel happy because of that. (: okay jiayou agnes, you can do it, and you will do it! ^^
i officially only have two weeks to study properly over the june holidays. which isn't good. damnit. T.T
that means i have to work doubly hard. cause you people have twice the amount of time as compared to me. -.-ll *screams unfairness* oh well. thats life. :x
Saturday, May 10, 2008
guys, I'm sorry for that sudden show of drama, i couldn't take it anymore. i'm really sorry for that unpleasant experience and yeh. thanks for all the comforting.
thanks to shermin, yiting, karen, qianru, nishanthi, wenhui, tiffany, eleanor, denise, alpha, natalie, grace, the guys: moses, jason, edwin, sirhan, basically, the whole of 08A05. i really love you guys. and yes. weida, mervin. a big big big thank you to all of you guys. i feel better now. emotionally.
미안해요.
사랑앓이- F.T. island
그리울때 눈감으면 더 잘보이는 그런사람
잊으려 하고 지우려 하면 더 많이 생각 나는 사람
그사람 꼭 올꺼라고 내가슴에 해로운 거짓말을하고
꼭 올꺼라는 말은 안했지만 기다릴수밖에 없는 사람
너무나 많이 사랑한 죄 널 너무나 많이 사랑한 죄
난 너로인해 그 죄로인해 기다림을 앓고 있다고
내가 더 많이 사랑한 죄 널 너무나 많이 그리워 한 죄
난 너로인해 그 죄로인해 눈물로 앓고 있다고 .. 이렇게
그사람 꼭 올꺼라고 내가슴에 해로운 거짓말을하고
꼭 올꺼라는 말은 안했지만 기다릴수밖에 없는 사람
너무나 많이 사랑한 죄 널 너무나 많이 사랑한 죄
난 너로인해 그 죄로인해 기다림을 안고 있다고
내가 더 많이 사랑한 죄 널 너무나 많이 그리워 한 죄
난 너로인해 그 죄로인해 눈물로 앓고 있다고 ..
헤어짐 넘 빠른 사랑 잊혀짐은 늘 더딘사랑
늘 나에게만 늘 모진사랑 나 혼자 앓고 있었다고
그대 나를 이렇게 멀리 떠나가야만 했니
그대 나를 이렇게 멀리 떠나가야만 했니
그냥 내목숨다바쳐 사랑할껄 이젠 날잊고 살아갈 무정한 너
그냥 내전불 다바쳐 사랑할껄 이젠 날잃고 살아갈 너
내목숨 다바쳐서 사랑할 사람
내게는 눈물만 주고 간 사람
늘 나에게만 늘 모진사랑 나 혼자 앓고 있었다고
내가 더 많이 사랑한 죄 널 너무나 많이 그리워 한 죄
난 너로인해 그 죄로인해 눈물로 앓고 있다고 .. 이렇게
the translations:
Love Sick- F.T. Island
translation by: HyoJung (also credit: aheeyah.com)
When you cry, you can close your eyes and clearly see that person
When you forget and ignore, you’ll remember that person even more
That person will come back, my heart is a seaway; with lies
I didn’t tell you I would come back; you’re someone who can only wait
It was a mistake to love you too much, a mistake to love you too much
Because of you, because of what I love, I suffer from waiting
To love you more was a mistake, a mistake to desire you so much
That person will come back, my heart is a seaway; with lies
I didn’t tell you I would come back; you’re someone who can only wait
It was a mistake to love you too much, a mistake to love you too much
Because of you, because of what I love, I suffer from waiting
To love you more was a mistake, a mistake to desire you so much
The breakup was so fast, if you forget love you’ll know more
To me you were my love, I knew that by myself
You left me, and went somewhere faraway
You left me, and went somewhere faraway
I should have loved you my whole life and now you’re going to forget me and go
I should have loved you all to myself and now you’re going to forget me and go
You’re the one that I loved for my entire life
But you just left me with grief
I knew it all to myself
Because I loved you more, it’s a sin, because I missed you it was a sin
Because of you, I cried because of my sins… like this
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
she glared at her. uncontrollable anger just rose up from within her. hatred, anger, disappointment. she hated seeing her in that outfit, maybe she's secretly envious and jealous of her? maybe. probably. could be. but most of all, above all, she hated herself the most. for not being able to wear that, and being unable to get in there. she is disappointed with her academics, she hates herself for being stupid. she hates herself for not performing well at the appropriate timings. fate, she says. but she does not want to admit so. she tries to act nonchalant about it. but inside she is hurting very badly, as though a knife sliced through her inner organs, especially her heart. she feels that she cannot breathe, she feels that she is weak.
she tries to act nonchalant about it all. All about it, a nonchalant attitude.
Sunday, May 04, 2008
i finally got my microsoft office! thank you mummy and daddy! (((: i love my hoodie. sorry i have a lot of random thoughts now. :x i saw the inside of my dad's wallet today again. and i saw the photos of my sister and i side by side, when we were young. it was kind of heart warming. but again. why young baby photos. maybe because that time we were just so innocent and cute that we dont argue with him or anger him at all, is it just a symbolism of how much he wants to return to the past? okay maybe i'm reading too much into it. sorry. hahahaha random random random.
she sits by the window, watching seasons change, watching people past, watching, watching, watching. tears slid down her pale, perfect complexion and dripped down onto her open, frail hand. drip. drip. drip. her tears are never-ending, it is like a stream, it flows. her breathing is even. she is unresponsive, oblivious to things happening around her. her tears just flow. never-ending. never stopping.
then a flash of red.
Saturday, May 03, 2008
1 May 2008, Thursday.HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DADDY AND GRANDDAD AND ME.SENTOSA was cool. but it kinda made it sad too. like it's like this sudden rush of emotions when i see the 4zedders who were present. because i've seen them, it magnifies the yearning and longing to see them regularly, laugh with them, for the past to replay again. it's just overwhelming, to an extent that i almost wasn't able to take it. hearing the rest go on and indulge in their happy jc life makes me wonder why my jc life sucks so much. oh well it all boils down to perceptions again, like i told shermin. someone who loves SA will think SA is wonderful no matter what, and someone who dislikes SA will think otherwise. This is like further proven by Sirhan, who thinks TJ _____, whereas i love it to no end, and i dont know why. some things just have no explanation.
thanks to yanhui, eunice, terrance, collin, melo, shermin, atiqah, tiffany, mujia, szewaiy, simin, seon, daphne, denyse, eleanor, yiting, edwin, tian rong, nishanthi, wenhui, yiting, jiaqi, su-ann, colleen, celeste, elyssa, kevin, qianru, yuki, 4ZED and etcccccc people whom im-so-sorry-but-i-cant-remember-please-pardon-this-old-woman-who-has-short-term-memory. yeh. thank you so much for all your wishes, and some-gifts. i love you guys! *sends LOVE*
2 May 2008, FridayHAPPY BIRTHDAY
KEVIN!
parliament house is damn cool. and i wish i had a house like that. T.T
3 May 2008, SaturdayHAPPY BIRTHDAY
TIFFANY!
my mum FINALLY says yes to me putting braces. not now though wisdom tooth is killing me. -.-